Bessie, an example of living well. 

My grandmother passed away in August 1995.  I often think of her and the impact she had on my life so I decided this time, I would share her with you.  She lived in a small town in East Alabama and was born in an even smaller one.  One of nine children, she married her sweetheart (my grandfather) at 19 and their love affair lasted the rest of their lives.  She was beautiful---

Don’t you think?

She was kind and thoughtful and lots of fun.  When she died, I was 27 and a little over five months pregnant with my son.  I’ve always regretted that they didn’t meet.  There are things about him that remind me of her: his sense of humor and creativity, his interest in geography and history and most especially his joy for life.  So in truth I feel like I’ve hung onto a little part of her through him.

Anyway here are a few of my favorite memories:

• She always fished with a cane pole…..and typically caught more than the rest of us who were using much more advanced equipment.
• She laughed A LOT. 
• She didn’t think unmarried women should drink beer straight from the bottle/can as it made them appear ‘fast.’ 
• She used words like icebox and Co-cola and referred to Detroit as DE-troit and Hawaii as Hawah-ya.
• She and her best friend only called each other by their first names when they were alone. Otherwise they referred to each other as Mrs. Dunn and Mrs. Ussery. 
• Having lived through two World Wars and the Great Depression, she never wasted anything and did not allow us to do so either.
• She loved, loved her grandchildren and showed us in a hundred ways…sitting with us for hours while we swam in her pool, serving ice cream sandwiches for afternoon snack and letting us play in the attic, climb the magnolia tree and generally wreak havoc on her house.  Provided of course that we NEVER touched the muscadine vines or ran through the living room.

She also gave great advice.  And I’ve done my best to follow it:

• An empty coffee can is just the right size for cutting bread for tomato sandwiches. And you always cut the bread for tomato sandwiches.
• Good manners are a sign of respect for others. And being kind doesn’t cost anything.
• Vote every time you have the opportunity.  It is your right and your responsibility. 
• Strong, independent women have manicured nails, pluck their eyebrows and are not afraid to ask for help when they need it.
• A glass of sherry after dinner is good for your health.
• Love your children for who they are and not for whom you want them to be.
• Never forget that no matter how lost you might feel, God always knows where you are.

There’s so much more I want to tell ya’ll but it will have to wait for another day because I’m late for my nail appointment……J

Rest in peace Grandmother. 

md